who needs health?

"Are you interested in our health tips, Ms. B?"

"Honey, no! I'm trying to kill myself!"
She then laughed wildly and hung up.

Cancellation

Mr. C - "No one told me I had to tell you when I cancelled"

Me - "It is standard practice to tell a company when you no longer want their services."

Mr. C - "No, it isn't. Don't give me that. That's ridiculous."

Me - "Sir, there is no way for us to know that you no longer want service unless you tell us."

Mr. C - "I need to speak to your manager about this."

I'm too easily amused.

Every time my coworker (when talking to her customer) says the name Mr. Bean, I get flashbacks of Rowan Atkinson's genius and am very hard pressed not to giggle.